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Say what you will, but my posts are at least more frequent than leap years! - Musings of a mad man. [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
A Psychopathic Poet, The Devil's Bastard Son.

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Say what you will, but my posts are at least more frequent than leap years! [Mar. 4th, 2012 at the third stroke, the time will be 07:35 pm]
A Psychopathic Poet, The Devil's Bastard Son.
[Caution! Curefreak is |accomplishedaccomplished]
[Annoying the neighbours with |"Drive" In My Pants...REM]

Though they are about as frequent as a change in Chelsea F.C. management.

OK, firstly I sincerely apologise for the lack of posting on my part. It was actually my fault, though I am tempted to say that I was actually being paid by the U.S. postal service to NOT post or reply to emails in an attempt to destroy the internet and save the U.S. postal service from ruin...actually if they would like to send me a cheque I promise to buy some stamps with it.

So, a quick update on me. I actually have been keeping tabs on all of you, reading through my friends' page about 4 times a week, sometimes more. I think, in retrospect, this was a "bad" thing as it made me miss you guys less and therefore created no sense of urgency for me to post - weird, but I actually think it was like this.

The depression has been really bad. It's strange how you can be constantly bombarded by inner dialogue and yet find yourself completely speechless. I'm doing ok today and the last week I have been a bit brighter, so here's hoping :).

Job situation has been wacky really.

I quit the mattress place back in December, having given them about 14 months of my life. The money I was making there was really nice, but the whole 55 plus hours a week thing was getting me down. The job itself was something that makes retail, which is notoriously a tough gig, even harder. I could spend ages trying to describe it - and once I get a therapist I probably will, right up until the moment they throw themselves out of a window that is. For now though I think the following 8 minute cartoon sums it up pretty well, though be aware it is slightly not work safe: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XieR60HxYGE

Back in November I was recruited by a furniture company who basically told me a very large number of lies, so I gave 2 weeks notice at the mattress place, resisted their offers to try to keep me (I do admit they were tempting), and moved on, though the regional manager at the mattress place did promise to keep the door open for me should I wish to return at any point.

Hmm, yeah, the furniture place was an experience. They told more lies than a pack of politicians on a campaign trail.

Briefly put it turned out to be like being paid $4 an hour plus commission. Now the "selling" part of it was really a joke. Probably 2% of the time you interacted with a customer did you actually have any opportunity to "sell", as the customer walked around and either liked, or didn't like what you had. The place was very poorly set up stock wise. I mean there were lounge suites there but you had a choice of 1 colour only, if the customer liked it, but didn't like black, they were SOL and so were you! In the 3 months I was there I was their top salesperson, but I have to honestly say, given there were usually 3 of you in the store at any one time, taking in turns to take customers, the vast majority came down to luck. You were not allowed to pool commissions which really would have been a fairer way of doing it, although you were expected to load other people's sales as most people collected the stuff themselves and some of the bedroom pieces weighed well over 150 kgs (330 lbs). Now naturally if you are single handedly loading a bedroom suite for a co-worker from the warehouse out the back and taking it to their truck, you are not actually in a position to help your customer. It really was a teenage job. As for it being mainly commissioned based, picture working at Target, or K Mart and getting paid on commission, pretty much the same opportunity to "sell" and level of "salespersonship" going on!

I quit there last Friday, giving them just 1 day's notice and when the manager complained that I was only giving a day's notice I said "Yeah, well had you not blatantly lied to me about the pay structure at the interviews I wouldn't be giving you notice right now because I would never have come to work for this shit hole in the first place!"  I gave him quite a few other digs before I left too, as not only did they lie to me about the pay, the work, the hours etc., but they also lead me to believe that there was excellent opportunity to move into management, but after I started I talked to a couple of the higher up the food chain managers and found out all management recruitment is done from outside, as they don't feel comfortable promoting from within.

Tomorrow I have induction for my new job. It's working for a large hardware store (Think Bunnings or Home Depot depending on where you are) selling flooring (Carpets, rugs, hardwood flooring etc.). I have had a good chat to the store manager about where I want to go and he seems like a genuine guy and said he will make that happen. Also this time I did a bit of research and spoke to staff who said he really is a good guy and a man of his word and advancement can and does happen there. As one manager put it to me "This is a great place to work and move up in if you want; if you don't want to then it's not a bad place to hang out until you find the place you do want to work. The very weird part of this job is 1. They strictly limit your hours to 39 or 40 a week (Overtime is occasionally offered at time and a half) and 2. It is not commissioned AT ALL! There are department bonuses, but this is the first time in my 20 plus years of selling that I am not involved in the head f**k that is commission - I can't even explain how weird and exciting this feels!

Last Saturday night I went out for drinks with a couple of the guys who I worked with at the mattress place and one of them said he had let the Regional Manager know I was leaving the furniture place and that the Regional Manager wanted me to call him (He apparently "isn't allowed" to contact me) to discuss the terms under which I would consider returning to them  (ie. 4 days a week, my choice of store/s, etc. etc.). It's nice to know I still have this as a "Plan B" :).

OK, time I shut up and hit "post", especially since my Mac keeps giving me the spinning wheel, as I am overdue for a software update and frankly I feel like I am the gimp for a hippy psychiatrist!

Oh and a question for you all: Why is it cats sleep 20 hours a day, but they cannot make those 20 hours coincide with the 6 that I am trying to sleep?

[User Picture]From: bender_927
2012-03-05 12:52 am (UTC)
Answer: It's cause they don't give a shit!

Good to see you around again, Freaky. :D I'm happy for you getting the new job and having your Plan B.

You actually crossed my mind a few days ago, so it's weird but awesome you popped up.
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 01:18 am (UTC)
I'm sure they were nice thoughts you were having about me - I'm also sure it rains chocolates on Wednesdays! ;)
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[User Picture]From: ghost_light
2012-03-05 01:01 am (UTC)
Good to see you!

When Nemo was being a real shit about not letting us sleep, we tried waking him up all day long. It didn't work.
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 01:20 am (UTC)
I've actually always wondered about adopting that approach myself, but I've never tried it out - probably because the thought of a sleep deprived cat going into a psychotic state kind of scares me (a lot!) *lol*.
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[User Picture]From: blind_sublime
2012-03-05 02:15 am (UTC)
Little shit :)
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 02:18 am (UTC)
*Lol* Now that might just be the title of my autobiography ;)
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[User Picture]From: jhoc
2012-03-05 02:20 am (UTC)
They could, they just choose not to, as it amuses them to no end to annoy us....

And, yay!!!! It's you!!
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:36 pm (UTC)
It is me, a very thankful me. Your emails got me through some pretty rough times, so I am eternally thankful...note I did not say "indebted" as one day I may be rich ;P
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[User Picture]From: gypsynash
2012-03-05 02:29 am (UTC)
SO glad to see you!!!!! I TOTALLY get the whole "once in a blue moon" posting thing and am more than guilty of it myself. Just want you to know you were sorely missed and oft thought of! *HUGS*
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:40 pm (UTC)
Awww, you sure know how to make a guy smile :)! I saw your update a while back and I actually cheered that there was an update from you - I might have to put blue cellophane over the moon...Hmmm, did I steal that from a corny '60s song without realising it? It kind of has that sound to it *lol*.
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[User Picture]From: thedrought
2012-03-05 02:36 am (UTC)
*waves* nice to see you :)
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:41 pm (UTC)
*Waves back* Nice to not feel quite so much like a stalker now when I read your LJ :)
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[User Picture]From: xainthia
2012-03-05 03:22 am (UTC)
YAYAYAYAYAY!!! I was just wondering about you the other day....thinking about the time you came to NY and never got to meet me...but met my now-Hubby at the time. Come visit us in NY soon!
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:42 pm (UTC)
It's so weird that whole intertwining of lives, I mean heck, it's not like NYC is small like Adelaide, or the town my Dad's house is in! I think a visit may well be in order one of these days :)!
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[User Picture]From: museofmyself
2012-03-05 04:02 am (UTC)
Reading this post from you makes me so happy that if you lived closer, I would invite you over for something extremely, extremely naughty. ;D
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:43 pm (UTC)
Well you could always set up a webcam and....Yeah, look who hasn't changed *LOL*.
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:46 pm (UTC)
It was rocky for a while, but that is par for the course I guess. How are you doing? You keep those emotion things and LJ separate most of the time, but that doesn't mean I think you are emotion-free! :)
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[User Picture]From: koulagirl666
2012-03-05 09:49 am (UTC)
*glomps onto you* I MISS YOU

i will never leave lj as long as you still -might- post. it is happymaking that you have good news!!

if you sleep 6 hours and the cats sleep 20 then there is 2 hours overlap and that is more than enough to function on. now that you have more reasonable hours your cat does not have as much of a pressing need to wake you up for work, therefore because cats are smarter than we are (with some notable and present exceptions, miaow) you can expect that if you ask nicely, explain clearly, and does the cat food with kitty rohypnol...
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:50 pm (UTC)
I can't honestly say that I have ever been glomped before, though I must admit it was rather pleasant :).

I will hold you to this promise!

*LOL* Yeah, I can see me getting busted with rohies and telling the cops it was for the cats. They didn't believe it when that guy claimed it about the porn sites (Ehh, he said the cat smooshed his keyboard and sent him there, not that he was giving the links to his cat *GRIN*), but in my case it would be true, that's just how my life is :P
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[User Picture]From: elizaswain
2012-03-05 01:57 pm (UTC)
Okay I will have to enumerate this reply as well. :)

1. No apologies necessary. It is good to know you are hanging in there, but this is your LJ to do with as you choose. See the little "Blogging Without Oligation" button on my LJ.

2. I would have guessed it was the airline companies paying you to not write, because I was about to fly to Australia and start looking for you.

3. That does make sense that you "miss us less" - it's like getting letters from someone even if you can't write back. At least you know what they're up to.

4. I am glad things are getting brighter. It will be interesting to see if your feelIngs tie in at all to your work situation. I am hopeful that your new job (which sounds awesome!) will help you keep a brighter outlook. I know it's way more than that, but I also know a bad job cam make a bad emotional patch worse. Did I ever link you to Hyperbole and a Half? It's an awesome comic/blog and her latest one is about depression. I don't know that it's any big help or anything but I just felt like she really gets it. http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com

5. Am I on 5? I'm on m iPod and the reply window is so small, I can't see my previous number. Anyway, I was going to say congratulations on your new job and I am excited and hopeful for you! I kind of already said that above, but it's worth repeating.

6. Since there are only 24 hours in a day, if you sleep 6 and cats sleep 20, you should at least overlap by 2. 20+6=26. 26-24=2. You know, in case you needed to see the math. :)

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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-05 11:57 pm (UTC)
Well had I known you were going to try and track me down I'd have stayed away - and not because it would be fun to play a game of "Around the world hide and seek", though now you mention it perhaps we have the ingredients of a new reality tv show right there - similar to The Amazing Race!

I really felt "tortured" sometimes, I had things I wanted to say but my fingers would just freeze at the keys and then I'd just consider my views, opinions, feelings etc. as worthless anyway and go back to my self absorbed misery - I should have started an emo band *lol*.

I've not been linked to that site, but I will be checking it out, so be concerned if it's garbage ;).

I am so thankful for your math skills. I won't go into how long it took me to realise my icon was humourous and not a statement of fact ;)

7 is lucky yet again :)!
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[User Picture]From: headbanger118
2012-03-05 04:18 pm (UTC)
It goes without saying (but I will anyway) that I am THRILLED to see you back. Since I have begun posting again, I have missed the wit and wisdom of the Freak.

Job hunting sucks. Bill spent from July of 2010 till August of 2011 doing it while working at a cell phone repair company for a little above minimum wage. Finally he got on at Eastman Chemical in Kingsport and we are good. Here's praying that you get into a good situation (the hardware place sounds promising) where you can settle in and be comfortable.

Ah, Depression....my long-time nemesis. I have been on medication for it for over 20 years, and while it certainly takes the edge off, there is no magic pill that words all the time, as you know. Please know that many people here love you and use that mantra when it gets very bad. I often use Bill, C, and bluesilverkdg (Kim) to keep me grounded when it gets very bad.

So glad to see you back! :D
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-06 12:05 am (UTC)
Wit and wisdom eh? Wow, absence truly does make the heart grow fonder *lol*.

Minimum wage, that's about 6 cents an hour and a stale cookie at Christmas in the US yeah? Damn Capitalism - Oh come on, you didn't really expect me to resist did you??!! I am so glad things have improved, you guys really deserve it, it just sucks how many people are finding it so tough and how employers are abusing that...I am resisting another Capitalism comment here, call it my welcome back present to you *lol*.

Thus far I have avoided all medications for depression. I am lucky, I can function, albeit very low level and I just convince myself I am feeling it for a reason - though truth is the "reason" is probably that I am too stupid and stubborn to get meds :P. I am truly a lucky guy to have such a great network of people here on LJ - I also don't have to wear pants when I'm hanging out with them!
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[User Picture]From: morrigan716
2012-03-05 07:16 pm (UTC)
Welcome back!
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-06 12:07 am (UTC)
Why thank you...Oh and I'd have said it in a Disney voice but it just wouldn't have worked via text on a computer screen (Actually it wouldn't have worked in person either, but shhh *lol*)
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[User Picture]From: lulu_girl
2012-03-05 08:21 pm (UTC)
hi hi! :D
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[User Picture]From: curefreak
2012-03-06 12:07 am (UTC)
'ello, 'ello person I must visit again :)
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[User Picture]From: beingadele
2012-04-12 12:16 pm (UTC)
It's been so long since you've posted! But, alas I cannot make fun of you as it's been almost a year since I have. Should I amend it? I don't think many people on my flist read LJ any more. What do you think?
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