smooth

Contact...and I don't mean that lame ass movie with Jodie Foster

This is a post that will remain here all the time.

All replies to it are screened and will remain screened and not just so it appears that no-one has ever had a problem with me ;).

Essentially it is so you can tell me anything, be it good, bad, or even, heaven forbid, a problem with me. *LOL*.

It is also a place to let me know if you have a problem in, or with, one of the communities I moderate.

It is an anything post. It's up to you what it is :).

Further details/explanation/credit for this idea can be found here.

If you came here to ask for advice anonymously from my friends' list, please click this and the magic of internet transportation will take you where you need to go.
  • Current Music
    "Rats" In My Pants...Sonic Youth
Alex

(no subject)

So as my plans for world domination gain momentum, by "gain momentum" I mean I got out of bed this morning afternoon, but whatever, I have made some decisions. Firstly, if I am going to do this properly I have to do some research. To this end I have watched the movie The Dictator by that Borat/Ali G guy and also I have been eating a lot of oranges - the latter seemed to work quite well for Idi Amin.

I have also decided that it is a little bit dangerous to run the world as a dictator, just ask Saddam or anyone else that the U.S. has decided annoy them. For that reason, and because I like the word "quasi", I have decided that my rise to power will involve a quasi election. For this to be successful I need someone to run against, preferably someone with no legs and no means of transport thus making their "running" more like sitting on a stump of a body in one spot while I run off into the sunset.

So I have been searching the internet and I found this guy right in my backyard of Australia. His name is Toby Ralph, which is a good start because that is a really silly name and no one can take someone seriously if they have a silly name, I mean Humphrey Bogart and Marlon Brando are prime examples of this, as though those guys would ever become popular with names like that, not to mention Engelbert Humperdinck!

Even better Toby Ralph (Giggles at the name hoping the giggling becomes contagious, or even better really annoying and that the annoyance is attached to the name making you hate him even more) has some rather outspoken views on the poor. He recently wrote an article suggesting the poor should be killed. I have put the whole thing under the cut Collapse )

He is a turtle neck sweater and a houndstooth scarf away from perfection as my opposition, so stay tuned and I will update when he returns my phonecall.
  • Current Music
    "Milkman of Human Kindness" In My Pants...Billy Bragg
Vyv

World Domination Update.

As you are probably aware I am planning on becoming Undisputed World Leader. As such I have plans. My first plan is not to get out of bed until at least 2pm daily. The rest of you can get up as required, but me, no way. You see they say that "the early bird catches the worm", well who is to say I am not a worm in the scheme of things? As such I'll be buggered if I am going to explore the intestinal tract of a bird and certainly not at some ungodly hour that precedes mid afternoon!

Consider yourselves informed.
  • Current Music
    "No one is to blame" In My Pants...Howard Jones
BB Weird Face.

Ooops he did it again!

I am by no means a fan of the British royal family, however at least old man Prince Philip (The Queen's husband) can make it all somewhat interesting. Below is a news article about his latest effort and it includes a couple of his previous comments too.

The Duke of Edinburgh has joked about the number of Filipinos working in Britain's National Health Service (NHS) - telling a nurse her country must now be "half-empty", it has been reported.

Philip, who is famed for his off-the-cuff remarks, made the hospital worker from the Philippines laugh with his comment during a visit to open a cardiac centre.

BBC Online reported the Duke as saying to the unnamed woman: "The Philippines must be half-empty - you're all here running the NHS."

Philip's remark came during a visit to Luton and Dunstable University Hospital on Tuesday, where he officially launched the multimillion-pound cardiac centre.

A spokeswoman for the hospital described the royal visit as a huge boost for staff morale and said the Duke was in a jovial mood, making jokes throughout his tour.

Philip had a stent fitted to clear a blockage in a coronary artery in December 2011 and when, during the visit, he was given a gold plated stent, he quipped that he now had a spare.

The Duke is well-known for his outspoken comments and famously told British students during a 1986 state visit to China: "If you stay here much longer, you'll all be slitty-eyed."

He also once told a group of deaf youngsters: "Deaf? If you are near there, no wonder you are deaf," referring to a school's steel band.

He also Susan Edwards, who is blind, uses a wheelchair and has a guide dog: "Do you know they have eating dogs for the anorexic now?"

The hospital spokesman said of yesterday's visit: "Staff greatly enjoyed the opportunity to meet the Duke of Edinburgh, and we regard all personal conversations he had with our staff and guests as private and therefore would not comment on them."
Buckingham Palace said it did not comment on private conversations.
  • Current Music
    "God Save The Queen" In My Pants...Sex Pistols
dumb people

I'd have used sarcasm, but even with it being the lowest form of wit it'd still be over your head!

Caution: Venting Ahead!

Ok, so I did a post in two communities about religion. In my introduction I said "I myself am not religious per se, I guess I am more agnostic, aka backing my odds both ways in case there is a higher power or powers *lol*."

3 separate people felt the need to comment that this is not what agnosticism is and that I had no idea obviously what it meant/is.

Well how do I put this gently... IT WAS A JOKE YOU MORONS!!! as hinted at by the "*lol*" at the end of the statement!

Thank goodness I didn't mention Anglican religion being people who worshiped Pythagoras otherwise they would have believed I was the the offspring of the village idiot and the TV weather girl!

I didn't bother trying to explain to them that it was a joke, because, well it's more fun to come here and rant about it ;). Next time though I'll make the post complete with flashing, sparkly arrows pointing to the statement that say "This is a joke!" and "Look, it's a joke!".
  • Current Music
    "Shoplifters Of The World Unite" In My Pants...The Smiths
fired up

(no subject)

I will NOT kill my boss.

This counts as a disclaimer that will stand up in a court of law right? I mean if she is found with an axe through the back of her head no one will look at me with accusing eyes. Everyone will all assume, based on this post, that she tripped over a lawn mower and fell backwards on to an axe in a rare, ok, extremely rare (think Halley's Comet to the power of 10 rare) moment of attempting to do something other than delegate work while waddling around like a penguin who owes a loan shark a large sum of money and donated their kneecaps as a down payment on the overdue sum of money.

No, it wasn't me, I wasn't even there. HONEST!
  • Current Music
    "Liar" In My Pants...Henry Rollins
Knowledge 2

(no subject)

I'm not going to make a reference to the Deep South in relation to my "annoying the neighbours with" because hillbillies have lots of guns, so instead I give you curefreak's thought of the day - for those who refuse to think for themselves.

It is a reasonably commonly accepted view that tv shows introduce a baby as a character when they start going down hill in quality/entertainment value.

This is further backed up in my mind by the fact that soap operas almost invariably have babies in them from the start!
  • Current Music
    "Sister's Crazy" In My Pants...The Candy Harlots
Strange

(no subject)

I know I ought to claim that I do the following because I am a Sociologist, thing is I don't think any of you would buy it, so I am going to just admit I do the following because I am just a little stranger than strange at times. I enjoy reading police crime logs.

Now the following is an excerpt from a police log in one area of the U.S. coming up to Christmas. I admit there were other crimes reported that I have not posted - none of which involved me btw ;) - but for me these were certainly the highlights and these actually made up 75% of the report.

No wonder they call it the silly season!

Friday, December 21
2:00 p.m.: A resident walking into the station was upset that the Post Office was not flying the United States flag at half staff as directed by the President. The resident wanted her complaint logged.
5:07 p.m.: On Gordon Road, a homeowner reported that someone entered his property today and took his American flag off the front of his house. He claims this was not from the wind as the entire pole is gone as well.
11:49 p.m.: At The Great American Tavern on Main Street, an employee called to report a patron in the parking lot threatening to shoot people and blow up the restaurant. Police were unable to locate the person.

Saturday, December 22
1:28 p.m.: A walk in to the station reported that there is a vulgar lawn decoration on Park Street with Santa urinating that he wished to be removed. The owner was contacted and agreed without issue to take the item down this afternoon. This is the second time in two years this has happened.

Monday, December 24
7:36 p.m.: A lot of noise in the background was heard before a 911 hang up. On call back, police spoke with a male party who stated they were having a small New Year’s party. He was reminded that it was Christmas Eve.
12:01 p.m.: Police received a call from a woman who said that while buying brake pads at Auto Zone, an employee offered to install them for her. She reported that Hyannis Police called her and stated that her vehicle was abandoned on the beach and had to be towed before the tide took it away.
  • Current Music
    "Eloise" In My Pants...The Damned
BB Cult?

This is the post where I first come up with the term "a real Vegan thing".

Having worked in sales for a little while now, "a little" while being the context of world history and rather longer in calendar years than I care to mention, I have seen an ever increasing amount of American based sales techniques coming into play. Some of these are good, some are weird (I'm sorry, but standing in a huddle chanting my company's name at 7am does a lot less to motivate me than allowing me to sleep for a few extra hours and start at 10am) and some, well just don't work for me.

Case in point with ones that don't work for me. We are often encouraged to refer to the customer by name during our interaction these days. I see they are pushing to personalise the sales process, but really dropping the customer's name again and again is not something I am confident doing. I'm not sure if that is because I hate having sales people do it to me, or if I hate them doing it because I don't do it. It's a real chicken and egg dislike thing...or, perhaps I hate both, in which case it is a real Vegan thing! *GRIN*.

One company I worked for even referred to it as "the sweetest sound a customer can hear". Eh, yeah, right, I think "Free" would sound sweeter to them, but heck, maybe I know nothing so, have a poll....

*Please note I forgot to bold the word uncomfortable in this poll and it is kind of an important distinction, so please pretend it is bolded. Thanks :).

0 means you like it/are fine with it.

5 means you are not bothered either way, or it depends on the salesperson.

10 means it creeps you out big time, or annoys the stuff that should be flushed down the toilet out of you.



How uncomfortable does having a salesperson refer to you by name while trying to "make the sale" make you feel?

Mean: 7.89 Median: 8 Std. Dev 1.66
0
0(0.0%)
1
0(0.0%)
2
0(0.0%)
3
0(0.0%)
4
0(0.0%)
5
3(16.7%)
6
1(5.6%)
7
1(5.6%)
8
7(38.9%)
9
2(11.1%)
10
4(22.2%)
  • Current Music
    "Sorted for E's & Wizz" In My Pants...PULP